Dear John! An open letter to John Key.

Dear John,

A couple of days ago it was announced you were to travel to Europe.  Nice one, meeting important people and travelling around some interesting cities while feasting on good (free) food and quaffing great wine while wearing expensive Paunamu washed suits and with the wife too!

One of the reasons you had to do all this important stuff was because you wanted to get first-hand information on the issues currently confronting Europe!

Now I know you care about New Zealand and don’t really want to spend our tax money on unnecessary journeys especially with what is coming down the economic pipeline so I decided to write to you and give you a direct insider look at what is currently happening in Europe and by extension to us.

And while I know you love the queen’s Gorkies and you get on famously well with her and all but as a person well aware of her peoples plight in these economic uncertain times I’m sure she will be equally happy with a phone call from you.

I also understand that having dinner with David “Flatulence” Cameron and Stephen “Tar sand” Harper has a sort of c’est ne se quoi but I’m sure that if you explain to them that you have children starving in the streets who need your urgent attention they will fully understand your reluctance to spend our tax money on what is basically a bit of a lark and you will have promoted New Zealand “Green Clean” image at the same time what with you saving on carbon emissions which as the minister of Tourism I’m sure you will want to promote.

I’m sure David Letterman would love to have you on video call on his show this time so you can tell the world about your self sacrifice in not going to London only to have dinner a couple of times even if it was with important people.

As for visiting the NATO head honcho and unelected presidents I’m sure you will understand that most of us don’t really want you to meet with them. Most of us like to keep things democratic and peaceful and with the attacks on Afghanistan and Iraq, (yes, I understand you inherited those from Helen but come on… 11 years of war?) the “liberation” of Libya and the pending liberation of Syria, NATO is anything but the protector of Peace in Europe.

I know you were also going to meet with the Governor of Bank of England, Dr Mervyn King, Chancellor Angela Merkel and German Foreign Minister Guido Westerwelle but I can save you those trips because we have all the information right here in New Zealand thanks to the glorious invention of the interweb and Google.

So with all travel expenses back where they belong, in the taxpayers purse we know you respect so well, lets get on with the issues facing Europe!

Well, to start with the most obvious, it’s not looking well. Even our Mainstream media has had to come clean on Greece being more or less bankrupt. They blamed it on the Greeks being lazy and not paying their taxes of course but I think you and I no a little better than that, don’t we?

It is one thing to accuse the Greek of being lazy and devious but Spain seems to be having their own financial problems and Italy is teetering too and just today it was announced that the Irish need a second bail out and France’s banks too have huge problems.

What’s more, one of your heroes and colleagues Jamie Dimon the CEO of JP Morgan (who happened to open a branch in New Zealand a year before your election) just had to do major damage control because his investment office in London just lost $ 3 Billion that we know of  and rumour has it that this could be much, much more.

And just because it is not spelled out in the mainstream media doesn’t mean you don’t know, because as a rich Wall street/City of London insider you most probably will have subscriptions to Bloomberg, the Wall street journal and the Financial times just to name a few.

I mean you don’t earn $ 50 million by being ignorant of the Global Financial situation. In fact the way you earned your money, with Foreign exchange and Derivatives, knowing what the hell was going on was your bread and butter and old habits die hard, don’t they?

I mean, I know you came back to save New Zealand and make it bigger and better but a man has to think of the future and politics is nice and all but after you’ve saved New Zealand there are so many more great adventures to be had, n’est pas?

So if Greece is not collapsing because they are lazy devious bastards than why is it collapsing?

Well… unless the contagion your financial newspapers speak of is that all the countries affected have their populations become lazy, devious bastards overnight, it means there is a deeper, more structural problem.

I know that most people in New Zealand think of the Mediterranean countries as lazy and not as trustworthy as the Northern European countries and that only the English and the Germans really qualify as real people.

Well, not the lazy peasants of course who just scrounge off the hard working and deserving elite ( I think you handled that really well over here what with you cutting off good education to most NZ kids, kicking those welfare mothers were it hurts such as cutting evening classes, taxing kids and making the elderly pay more for their care while their carers keep the same wages. Great stuff).

The English are real people because they are noble (No, not the peasants) and the Germans because they work hard, save and make really good quality stuff in their own country.

Which probably explains your choice of Governor of Bank of England, Dr Mervyn King, Chancellor Angela Merkel and German Foreign Minister Guido Westerwelle for a visit but not how you aim to get a better insight into why all this financial malarkey is happening!

I told you at the beginning that I was going to bring in a great insider who can tell you what and why we are seeing the problems we are seeing and I would like to invite him to join the conversation at this point.

His name is John Key. Yes, John he has the same name as you! In fact he looks just like you! Oh well, let’s be honest actually it is you.

Yes John, you are the insider who knows very well what is going on and you told us many, many times. In fact you even told us on Breakfast TV.

You don’t remember? Well, let me see… how about some quotes?

” If you go all the way back to what’s caused the global financial crisis you can apportion an enormous amount of the blame at the foot steps of Wall street and it ultimately created products that destroyed capital around the world and fitfully destroyed banks around the world.:

“I mean they sold products that in their heart of hearts they must have known they wouldn’t be repaid for so I can understand that bit….” 

You made this statement on Breakfast TV John, I mean that is pretty damning right there; It is Wall streets fault!!! And it destroyed banks around the world!!!

Thing is John, what were those products you mention? Is that the reason you have to talk to Governor of Bank of England, Dr Mervyn King, Chancellor Angela Merkel and German Foreign Minister Guido Westerwelle?

Do you have to learn about those products because all of this happened after you left banking?

I think you and I know better than that don’t you? You and I know that those products were already used when you were just a trader puppy for Bankers Trust and that you were involved in the first ever Attack with these products on a Nations money supply! Remember Andrew Krieger? You and him made US$ 300 million in one October afternoon in 1987 for Bankers trust manipulating the entire money supply of New Zealand. And look I sorted out the confusion about the dates and whether you bought or sold too!

In fact Andrew Krieger and that deal is named as patient Zero in a book about infectious Greed which deals with the history of the Derivatives trade on Wall street and London

Yep, you did and you know full well that Bankers trust collapsed in 1995 after it turned out that their traders where ripping off their customers knowing full well they were doing so. You guys even had a word for it! ROF;  Rip of factor.  That was so smart.

Little stupid talking about it over the phone though. Thank God it wasn’t you.

In fact you said when all hell broke loose “right I’m out of here”.

And what was your next step? Oh right, it was working for Merrill Lynch and what did you do there? Yep, you helped them set up their own bonds and derivatives department from 1995 until 2001. And while you were doing so your bank and all the other too big too fails were lobbying to get rid of that nasty little bit of law remaining standing between them and the real big money; the Glass Steagall act.

Here is what your boss had to say about you at the time:

“he revolutionised the blue blood investment banking sector.” Steve Bollotti

Can’t remember either? Oh well, here is a quote form that nice flattering “Unauthorised biography” written by Eugene Bingham of the NZHerald  just before your election:

“I had a whole lot of people working for me who were at the cutting edge of delivering quite complex and new and innovative products. They tended to either be a new product or into a new market, usually the emerging markets, Russia, Brazil, Argentina. I wasn’t the guy sitting there dreaming it all up, but I was the guy who was responsible for those people.”

In fact you did so in both London and New York which was great because it allowed Merrill Lynch to do whatever it wanted as London is like banker Paradise; No rules, no limitations, no checks and balances and as a result a banking debt of 950% of GDP!

And in Ireland of course which for some reason seems to be teetering too!

Here is what Fran had to say about it:

Article by Fran O’Sullivan titled – Key chases luck o’ the Irish – published New Zealand Herald July 20 2005;

Key is clearly on a roll as he lists the options New Zealand could explore if it decided to abandon outdated ideology and take a more pragmatic approach to growing the economy.

The former investment banker knows what he is talking about.

As head of global foreign exchange for investment giant Merrill Lynch he shifted a considerable amount of his business to Ireland in the mid-1990s to take advantage of a 10 per cent tax rate for foreign investors.

The investment was a runaway success.

“We transferred across the aircraft leasing business, the complex interest rates derivatives business, the entire back office for global foreign exchange and a huge chunk of private clients’ business,” says Key.


Did you foresee the problems which resulted in the sub-prime crisis and are still causing damage? Well apparently you did because this is a quote from you again.

“Was it hard to predict? Not really.”


Apparently to top it all off you were invited into one of the most exclusive little clubs advising the Federal Reserve of New York, presumably because Steve Belotti who was so proud of you had that position before you. So you must have known a thing or two while you were a banker.

So let’s face it John, your own words speak to the fact that you know that the product you sold, helped develop and which many economists and billionaires pointed out as far as 1993 would eventually implode and take the entire global economy with it which is why I suggest you come clean, show us our entire financial situation down to the $112 Billion in derivatives you kept so slyly of the books (another trick you learned from your banking days) and tell us what the real solution is to our debt problem.

You don’t want too? I understand, I really do because to do that you would set yourself up to loose most of your fabulous wealth. That would be the shares you still have in Bank of America (who tried to put $ 75 Trillion in Derivatives they inherited from your bank Merrill Lynch on the backs of the US tax payers) for starters and I think we can safely assume you have shares of all the big military industrial complex corporations (Yes, I know they also make nice things such as washing machines and electrical tooth brushes) and those would also fall apart leaving you with even less.

God knows you might end up with just your pad in Hawaii when you come clean and the people of New Zealand get a bit pissed off with you and that would be a real bummer because those same corporations you have shares in also have a lot of money in Nuclear energy and we all know what happened in Fukushima and while our MSM doesn’t tell us what is going on you know that the entire Northern hemisphere  including and most especially Hawaii are getting stiff doses of fall out from the ongoing meltdowns.

I feel for you John, I feel for you and your banking mates because of course people are beginning to wise up to you and yours while you try to sell our assets to your mates which they will pay for with US dollars which will soon be totally worthless and and you and Bill English invest $ 112 Billion in off the books Derivatives which is an amount almost equalling our GDP and are now collapsing globally and no, you can’t hide behind the little people who might have done so believing they were a reasonable safe investment because you are the Prime Minister and you had information they should have had.

I mean if I know that Europe is leveraged at 26 to 1 and the ECB a whopping 36 to 1 I’m sure you know too and if traders can figure out the entire global GDP is dwarfed by 20x amounting to a whopping $ 1200 Trillion Derivatives bubble I’m sure you can too.

So you see John you don’t need to go to Europe to get first-hand information on the issues currently confronting Europe. You can’t get more first hand than yourself I hope you’ll agree!

With the kindest regards I remain in the hope (although I won’t hold my breath) you will reconsider and confess on Breakfast TV while you announce that from this moment on we will start to print our own money in an open and transparent way and that all mortgages made by the fraudulent Reserve bank system extracting all that money out of us by charging usury are nill and void (They did in Iceland which I noticed you are not visiting and it worked a treat).



16 thoughts on “Dear John! An open letter to John Key.

  1. This was posted by a member on my site to your blog which is reposted over there. Wanted to share.
    Jenny writes:

    Those of us old enough to remember the original ‘Dear John’ song can sing it through. Of course it will be mainly relevant to NZers, following a recent budget that proposes cuts to education, beneficiaries and carers, but does not affect the wealthy:

    Dear John, oh how I hate to write

    Dear John, I must tell you this tonight.

    You are fracking precious land

    For the evil banksters’ band,

    So your people do not love you, Dear John.

    Dear John, we know our country’s broke

    Dear John, you would be a better bloke

    If you cared more for the weak,

    They’re the ones who cannot speak,

    And their carers do not love you, Dear John.

    Dear John, our education’s good,

    Dear John, keep the teachers, this you should.

    You have upped the classroom size,

    You are taxing teenage guys,

    So our children do not love you, Dear John.

    Dear John, you’ve been to see the Queen,

    Dear John, what a joy that must have been.

    While you were swanning overseas,

    We were coping with the freeze, (weather and/or finance)

    To-wards you we’re rather chilly, Dear John.

  2. Muldoon had the right Idea but his vision was scuppered by successive Governments sold off the very thing our Taxes had just built. Now we have companies who have paid next to nothing for major infrastructure that our money paid for(Was that the plan of big business all along ?) Now we as a people pay more taxes(Some cases even triple taxed items) because we pay the Middle men(Private Companies) and the Government (Taxes), people are getting sick to their back teeth of it !

  3. I agree with Carol – I am hoping for the ‘fly through the Bermuda triangle and never returning’. Key is the ultimate jerk, over in Britain celebrating himself and the lady with a million dollar crown –


  5. Great letter Ev. So many people waking up to the true agenda going on behind the facade of a caring government of the people.

  6. Great job Ev …I look at Key and see a sleazy banker type and am dumbfounded that he could win an election ! …I hope our Prime Ministers don’t reflect who we really are as a people !
    I can’t imagine making a living on the ruin of others !

    • Carol, regards Rob Muldoon, i don’t know all the ins and outs, but it is relevant that for his ‘think big’ platform ( massive New Zealand infra-structure development) he was openly admitting to being into talks with Bruce Beetham (Social Credit leader & M.P. with unprecedented large public support) about using sovereign debt free money to fund the state investments.

      Muldoon started to experienced unprecedented personal ridicule, caricature and mockery for a p.m. in media, and was turfed out by a new left resurgence which then proceeded to hock of assets and remove protective barriers of independence for the economy.

      Muldoon was actually NZ’s last old school nationalist prime minister, left or right.

        • Cool.

          I’m not meaning to particularly promote socialistic state ownership of everything by the way nor oppose that. Shared public ownership of things for what is wanted by people with real choices for the public to those ends for all individuals is most optimum. The socialist ideology is often better than nothing in most cases but is hardly satisfactory. Anyhow, the above bit of NZ history is just an example of this issue & not meant as a black and white polemic.

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